REALITY TV CIRCUS

Despite all the nuttiness surrounding the now-canceled “Megan Wants A Millionaire” and that nutjob, the now-departed Ryan Jenkins, life went on in reality TV land and we had a show this week.

Real and Chance are still at it, trying to find the best stripper, uh, girl for their pea-pickin hearts. Aww…

In this week’s episode, the girls found themselves in the middle of a rootin-tootin Yeti hunt (Yeti played by the third Stallionaire, Micah) in which they had to hunt down the furry sucka and blow their horn.

The team featuring Blonde Baller and Junk did, winning a date with their man, Chance.

But it didn’t take long for the two to start fighting again, Junk accusing Blonde Baller of lying to Chance about having a boyfriend and so on.

You know, the usual. Anyway, Real’s girls were more subdued, as one might expect, because strippers can be chill, too…What, you thought they just took their clothes off for money? Whoa, are you wrong!

Apple, the least strippery of the bunch, tried to serve Real some breakfast in bed, which is usually a good thing. Except in this case, Real isn’t looking for love; he’s looking for boo-tay!

So no, Apple did not show up in a leather miniskirt with fake boobs bursting out of her top.

And Real sent her home at elimination. But the shocker came when Chance decided not to send either Blonde Baller or Junk home, despite the fact that both are bitches.

So 13 girls remain in the quest for Real and Chance’s love, I mean, manhood. Let the games continue!

Real and Chance kicked out Aloha, the Hawaiian girl who may have been the most certifiable person ever to appear on a reality TV show. She’s definitely up there for sure, with all the greats.

Saaphyri, eat your heart out, literally. Aloha chowed down on some grade-Q sushi (salmon from the grocer), and later told Real she had a stripper pimp who didn’t treat her well (left her in the middle of the desert to die, actually).

Then she told off Real several times because Real asked her if she was OK, and shared an intimate moment with Chance, telling him they belonged together because they both had mental illness. That pretty picture is waiting for you below.

Yikes! Hehe. Anyway, Real didn’t pick her at elimination and neither did Chance, so it’s aloha to Aloha until we see her on another reality TV show.

You will definitely see her on Charm School, but you might see her on I Love Money 3, because being cerifitable is a commodity in reality TV land. Look at The Entertainer, do you honestly think he’s sane?

Anyway, the Real Chance Of Love crazy train with strippers continues.

Wiggly was kicked out of the house this week on Real Chance Of Love 2, and from the looks of the promos Real and Chance are now gonna select their own girls, instead of choosing them together. Whew!

We all know Chance’s choice of women leaves something to be desired, but Real is kind of picking sluts this season as well, so whatever stripper the boys end up with, I’m sure they’ll be happy until at least the reunion show.

Anyhoo, Wiggly was gone from the get-go; her poem that she read right off the paper was lame as hell. In fact, Real was pretending to sleep during the whole thing.

Classy? No, but even I had trouble stomaching her poem. It seemed a little too juvenile, but what did you expect, Shakespeare? These are strippers! And actors.

The only thing that’s real about this show is that there are eliminations every week that are real.

If you ever expected anything less than full-throttle craziness and absolute insanity, then you don’t know Real Chance of Love, do you?

The second season of the hit reality TV show opened with more bimbos than you can shake a stick at!

In fact, I haven’t seen that many strippers on one show, ever! It’s almost like the people casting the show went to strip clubs to find the girls this time around. 

Real and Chance wasted no time getting rid of four girls. Show Me, a stripper who clocked Vegas upside her head for something Vegas (Tina) said and Vegas for instigating the fight with Show Me;  

As you can see from the picture above, Show Me is not only a stripper, she’s effing batshit crazy!

And then there was Ribbon, a crazy broad from Louisiana who was more of a freak/stalker than an actual fan of Real and Chance. Actually, Ribbon didn’t even get their names right, so what was she doing on the show, anyway?

And of course, she had to take the time to give the boys the finger salute. Nice. Nothing but class on the show this time around.

And finally, there was Freckles, who really should have been named Tattoos for all of the ink she had on her body. Anyone who knows Real and Chance knows they hate tattoos with a passion. Freckles was gone from the get-go.

So now the boys are down to 16. And this year, they’re not allowing the girls to pick which one they like best. I’m telling you, Real Chance of Love 2 is gonna be the best reality show ever.

In case you didn’t know, Real Chance of Love 2 begins in August. And the boys are out pimpin’ their show, currently in production.

They revealed a few cast names, like Hot Wings, for example. All I know is things are about to get crazy up in this bee-otch.

And you can tell that just by watching the interview they did with Chelsea Lately. Watch it above!