REALITY TV CIRCUS

Because of the death of “Megan Wants A Millionaire” star Ryan Jenkins, and because Jenkins was the prime suspect in the murder of his ex-wife Jasmine Fiore, who was found in pieces in a suitcase with her thumbs chopped off, VH1 has decided to cancel the remainder of the “Megan” show.

The only problem was, VH1 and 51 Minds were dumb enough to invite Ryan back for the shooting of I Love Money 3 as well, so that show has also been cancelled.

So basically, if you liked either show, you’re screwed, because the shows will never see the light of day.

“Megan” was guilty viewing, and Ryan, who famously told Megan she “didn’t have to sign a pre-nup” (Gee, wonder why?) in the season premiere of her show, is now dead and gone.

The part that really makes me mad is that I Love Money 3 is cancelled too! Who knows what madness we would have seen on that show. I would love to see the list of stars who were gonna be on that show, that’s for sure.

Anyway, Megan twittered about the whole Ryan ordeal. Sounds like she’s pretty broken up over it.

So ends the drama surrounding the search for Ryan Jenkins, as the star from Megan Wants A Millionaire was found dead in a motel room in Hope, British Columbia Sunday night.

According to the AP, he apparently hanged himself by a belt hanging to the bar of a coat rack.

He was also seen entering the motel room with a woman. Hmm…things get more interesting by the moment.

It still doesn’t explain why he supposedly did what he did, and now we’ll never know. I do think he killed his ex-wife Jasmine Fiore, else he wouldn’t have escaped to Canada, where laws are less stringent.

At any rate, now the attention focuses on the girl. Is she a hooker? Possibly. All I know is one door closes and another opens. How bizarre and how truly sad.

More to come…

After a short investigation, the Orange County District Attorney has officially charged Ryan Jenkins, a contestant on the reality TV show “Megan Wants A Millionaire” with the murder of his ex-wife, 28-year-old model Jasmine Fiore.

I wonder what Megan thinks of that.

Jenkins is still at-large, believed to be in his native Canada, according to information received at today’s news conference.

Police earlier issued a warrant for Jenkins’ arrest. Both Canadian and U.S. authorities are searching for the reality TV star, who reportedly fled to Canada via Washington State after Fiore’s body was found in California stuffed in a suitcase inside a trash can.

Reports are circulating that Jenkins’ marriage to Fiore, a stripper he met while she worked in a Las Vegas club, was not doing well.

In fact, one of the clues leading to the murder charge came from a text message Jenkins sent to a gentleman Fiore was seeing, which simply read, “suck it.” Classy.

Fiore was planning to return to Vegas to meet with the gentleman the day before she was found dead.

That douchebag Ryan from “Megan Wants A Millionaire” may become the first reality TV contestant murderer soon, because some real shit is raining down on him at this very moment.

Ryan (real name: Ryan Jenkins) of Calgary, Alberta, Canada is being sought in connection with the disappearance and murder of his wife, 28-year-old Jasmine Fiore who was found dead in a trash can after being stuffed into a suitcase. Eep.

Jenkins was supposedly with his ex the night before. WTF? All the details are still sketchy, but what really has me wondering is Ryan reportedly has escaped to Canada via a boat he took into a Washington harbor, docked, and then may have walked across the border to his native land. Emigre!

No worries, though, the U.S. and Canadian authorities are looking for Ryan.

And obviously, Ryan did not win the competition, else he would have still been with Megan. Ha!

But the sad part here is that somebody lost their life. Jenkins, in case you don’t know, has a criminal history and one of domestic violence both in Canada and the United States. Oh, and did I mention he’s a sex addict, too?

Megan sure knows how to pick them, doesn’t she? How in the hell did she–or her production team–slip up on this guy? Don’t they run background checks?

The pro wrestler Matt was sent home by Megan last night at the conclusion of episode 3 of the hit TV show Megan Wants A Millionaire, but the surprise of the night came when Megs also booted Joe, the closet gay who is obviously not into Megan (or girls) but is definitely here for the TV cameras.

I guar-an-frickin-tee you will see Joe on I Love Money 3, because he is psychotic enough to want to compete on that game show.

Joe also happens to be filthy stinking rich (worth $10 million) even though he inherited it all. Frankly, I doubt Megan cared that the money was kind of his in the first place (he owns about 20 percent of the family business); she just cared that it could have been hers at the end.

Instead she booted him out, just saying there wasn’t enough of a connection between the two. What, she couldn’t get over the fact the guy was gay? What in the hell is her problem? LOLZ

Anyway, there was also a competition, in which the guys had to come up with a business plan for Megz retarded dog Lili. Niiiiiice…Ryan won that and continued his Canadian butt kissing charade all the way through to a nice dinner, where he spoiled Megan and spent over $200 on the spread.

But the best part of the night happened when The Punisher and Francisco unveiled their business plan, which is below.

Actually, it was for a spa for Lili, but you get the idea, Two strippers = relaxation. Both survived for another week on the show.

Episode 2 of Megan Wants A Millionaire picked up right where it left off, except Megan now has the guys working out of their new offices: her mansion.

What? Yes, she still wants the to conduct business by day so that she can get that money. So basically, what we have here is a future trophy wife who isn’t afraid to tell a man what she wants, so long as they have lots of money.

Megan then had the guys give her another gift during the challenge. Out of those 15, three were chosen for the final round: Al, who gave her that $8.000 check he promised; Shaun, who performed some sort of body sushi; and Big Mike, who bought her a dress.

All the guys who thought with their hearts, their appendages and other things not related to money going into Megan’s pocket were out of luck, apparently.

But a most interesting thing happened during the final challenge. When Shaun attempted to run his credit card for some gifts for Megan, it was declined and Al, being the nice guy he is, footed the bill.

Nice? Yeah, but this is a game, and Al later told Megan what happened with the credit card. She wasn’t happy.

At elimination, it was the end of the road for Garth the Plumber, who really wasn’t her type.

But for Joe, who liked Megan’s dog too much–and others we won’t mention–Megan inexplicably decided to keep him. If he isn’t gay I will quit blogging forever. What is he doing on the show in the first place? He had about 10 million reasons to be on the show and that’s why he’s staying put.

Shaun was sent home as well, probably for being a cheapskate in Megan’s eyes. In this show it’s all about the money. And you’ve got to have some to be on it.

The new VH1 smash got going last night, and by all accounts, the nerds are finally winning!

Well, they aren’t winning yet, but they are gaining ground on other reality shows that promise a lot, but don’t deliver.

This show has already delivered geeks, creeps, freaks, wannabes and even a dude who wants his green card. Then she brought in two trusty blonde bimbo friends, Brandi C. from Rock Of Love and Cecille from Beauty and the Geek.

After Megan got to know each of the millionaires, she kicked three to the curb, a creepy movie director named Donald (above photo), a kid named James who doesn’t have his millions yet (they’re stored in a frust fund when his grandpa dies) and Audi, who was simply cast for the wrong show.

So, if you have zero funds or little to work with, you may be headed out of the house before you can say, “your credit has been declined.”

Definitely the least attractive reality TV show cast to hit the airwaves since Beauty and the Geek, VH1’s highly touted new reality show Megan Wants A Millionaire is ready to go, starting on Sunday, August 2.

Of course, anyone who knows Megan Hauserman from Rock Of Love knows she’s a total gold-digger, so what better way to have her showcase her skills than on a show like this?

Frankly, some of these dudes still look like geeks, even though they’re 40. But it’s hard to argue with somebody who reportedly makes millions. One thing’s for sure: Megan will know who’s really loaded and who’s just lying.

In this show, it’s up to Megan to weed out those who are pretending and don’t have what it takes to keep her happy.

Finally, is Megan looking for love? No. You’d have to be some kind of idiot to think that, after you have a look at the guys competing for her heart, and her aiming for their, uh, wallet.

The names of the contestants, uh, suckers, are mostly forgettable. Garth, Al, Francisco. There are a few, however, that stand out, like Punisher and my favorite, Sex Toy Dave.

Here they are below. One of these things is not like the other. Can you guess which one may be a stripper?

People are already pissed off about this show even being on the air, which means this will be one of the must watch reality TV shows of the summer.

And it kicks off Sunday, August 2. But why should I tell you about the show? Here’s the information from the horse’s mouth, VH1:

Blonde bombshell and “celebreality” vixen, Megan Hauserman is looking for love — but not with any average Joe. Megan has her eye, mind and heart set on one type of man…a millionaire! Unfortunately, Megan’s had her heart broken by Bret Michaels in Rock of Love 2 and lost out on the $250,000 check in I Love Money. But now she’s back with vengeance to find both love and money with the goal of becoming the ultimate trophy wife. This summer, Megan will put 18 millionaires to the test as they compete for her affection in Megan Wants a Millionaire, premiering Sunday, August 2, 2009.

Megan’s millionaire suitors will compete in challenges ranging from going head to head in a high roller Las Vegas tournament to shelling out money in a date auction. Whoever wins the challenge, will win a date with Megan. But, it won’t just be any date. The millionaires will be given the chance to “upgrade” their date. How about driving Megan to dinner in an Aston Martin, instead of an Escalade? Or why not take a helicopter ride to Catalina Island instead of the ferry? One by one, Megan will eliminate the guys who can’t shell out the dough, until the ultimate millionaire is left.

Heh. Uh, so basically the show will be about a trainwreck wearing a tankini everywhere, who is a goldigger. What’s next? A show about exploiting children?? VH1 has really outdone themselves this time, and I’ll bet this show will be a hit.